It is very rare for couples to go in for marital Counseling unless they are very close to considering divorce or till matters have deteriorated to such an extent, that they are not sure whether they can go on with the marriage. Fortunately there are also quite a few couples who consider that they will benefit from talking to a professional counselor when they find that there are issues in their marriage that can become major problems. The most sensible of couples choose to consult a counselor even before they get married. Even though others may find this strange, it does give the couple the confidence to make lifelong commitments with the knowledge that they have done everything that they could to start off their marriage in the correct way.
This sort of premarital Counseling encourages an exchange of views with all openness and honesty and thus enables the couple to get over any obstacles that they envisage or which they fear may arise later. When couples are engaged, the environment of the counselors office allows personal issues to be discussed safely and prevents these from becoming things that could affect the marriage. Here they can discuss what each person has in mind for the future and what goals they have for their future as a couple. It makes sense for a couple to discuss what they see as goals for the future, their individual career aspirations, whether they are planning a family and where they want to live. Such conversations that are frank can discuss all aspects of married life, and help a couple to strengthen their relationship by establishing areas where their thinking shows commonality and other areas where their divergent views may require compromises based on discussions.
While such dreams and feelings are shared, the counselor is able to gain an insight into the contentious issues that can arise in the married life of a couple and thus suggest ways that are constructive that can help to overcome them. Arguments can come up among couples who are loving, happy and secure and as long as these do not lead to lead to breakdown in relationships, they need not be a cause of concern. Counseling can help couples to learnt how to resolve conflicts in a practical way by confronting the causes of their arguments and endeavoring towards making sure that they do not recur.
Married couples can benefit from visits to a professional who is into marital Counseling even if they are not newly wed and have been together for 40 years. Marital Counseling is not a guarantee that the end result will be a happy one. There have been instances when even after years of therapy, couples may still decide that it is best for them to divorce or go in for separation. But then there have also been a number of marriages that have been saved by Counseling and where couples have decided to stay together. When you look for such professional help it is best to go to a counselor whom as a couple you feel comfortable with and here recommendations from friends or family who have used such services can come in handy. If the initial visits have you still feeling uncomfortable, probably it is best you consider changing the counselor. It is better to put in some effort at this stage as something very important like a marriage is at stake.